Food Fail: Kale-Chickpea Curry…ish

Today’s theme: Food Fail

Well, piddle on a fiddle. After last night’s dinner, I’m officially adding a new category to my MoFo list o’ themes: Food Fail. Totally shoulda built that one in from the beginning, right? At least it’s pleasantly alliterative! Anyway, this post will be both short and vaguely unpleasant, and also probably ugly. You’ve been warned; proceed at your own risk!

So – last night I wanted to make something quick yet flavorful and filling. As soon as I got home from work, I put a pot of rice on the stove and set to work. I wanted to make something chana masala/curryesque, so I opened up my trusty ol’ copy of VWAV and used the Chickpea and Spinach Curry as the [very loose] basis for my meal. I grabbed some kale and cherry tomatoes from the freezer (frozen at the end of summer; yay homegrown veggies!) and some leftover chickpeas from the blondies I made a few nights ago, and set to work. This was the result:


Okay, so it’s not exactly hideous, but it’s also not the most appetizing thing you’ve ever seen, right? In my memory it was much uglier. I suppose I’m conflating the result with the process, because the process of creating this meal was rather ugly. Whoever said that “a picture is worth 1,000 words” failed to consider the fact that pictures cannot include odors and textures and the entire story behind the photo. I mean, this meal was okay, but the process was… unpleasant. Consider the following:

  1. I burnt the garlic and had to scrape blackened chunks of mustard seeds and garlic from the bottom of the pan.
  2. I didn’t press my tofu or really cook it for very long, so it was… squishy.
  3. I undercooked the kale, and it was a bit tough. Plus there was really no base or sauce to the travesty of a curry, so it was really like rice + tough kale + squishy tofu + chickpeas… with some sad tomato skins for variety. Mmm… appetizing.

Needless to say, the stovetop fan got a good workout tonight. Oh well – it really didn’t taste terrible, and it could’ve been a much worse experience, and now that I’m writing about it I just sound like a whiny little brat. Well… the pan was a legitimate pain in the patootie to clean! So there. Cough.

Anyway, that’s all I’ve got for ya, folks. I’m just keepin’ it real, you know? MoFo can’t be all cupcakes and rainbows and prancing ponies all the time! Hopefully I won’t resort to this category too often, but… I can’t make any promises. ;)

Have you had any food fails lately? Do you post “ugly photos” on your blog? Are you less inclined to read about failures than successes?

Just FYI, I’ll be leaving for my work trip tomorrow morning. I’ll still be posting throughout the weekend, but probably not ’til late at night. I’m really anxious about the trip for about 4829 reasons, so feel free to send all your positive thoughts my way – I’d really appreciate them!


5 thoughts on “Food Fail: Kale-Chickpea Curry…ish

  1. Bummer on the burnt garlic. I made something very, very similar(minus tofu) last night but I used crushed tomatoes in addition to fresh, so there was a base sauce. Honestly, yours still looks great – but maybe I’m thinking of my delicious dinner.

    I will sometimes post failures and I’ve gotten a lot of good feedback on how to avoid problems from people who read my blog. Sometimes if it looks boring or ugly but tastes good, I may not post.

    Have fun and good luck on your work trip! I hope your anxiousness fizzles out once you get into it.


  2. I have a hard time believing you because that picture is actually making me hungry. Or maybe it’s just pretty difficult for me to think of any chickpeas + kale combo as gross in any way, shape, or form. I just love those two foods so much.
    When my cooking isn’t pretty or goes awry, I generally don’t get out the camera. I really want my food to look good but sometimes I’m too excited about something not to share due to a crappy picture (it’s the blogger’s disease). Food fails generally don’t make it on the blog. But it’s comforting to hear that I’m not the only one who still burns garlic haha.


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